Out with the Old, In with the New

Firstly, if you haven’t yet voted in my poll, please take an opportunity to do so! I always aim to please my readers!

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2011 is rapidly coming to a close, and tomorrow brings not only a new day and a new week, but an entirely new year as well. I have a tendency to become even more introspective than usual during the final days of December, reflecting on the past, critiquing the present, and, finally, pondering the future as I wistfully envision what I believe to be my full potential as a human being, my best life.

This was a very difficult year for me. To be honest, I have never experienced so much unhappiness and downright misery is such a concentrated period. It all began with studying abroad in France. Granted, whilst there, I was inspired to start Vegan on the Go-Go and I finally dared to get my nose pierced (a longtime fancy), but I can rightfully say that, from the very beginning, the voyage was otherwise a HUGE mistake—a regrettable waste of time, money, energy, you name it.

France was nothing, though, compared to losing not one, but both of my parents in the course of 6 months. I’ve mentioned my father’s death before, and now, I feel it necessary to share that my mother suddenly and unexpectedly passed away from cancer not even 2 weeks ago, on December 19^th.

My beautiful Hippie parents, circa 1973-4-5?

Daddy & me, 2009

Mum & me, 2010

In addition to the holiday season, this is the other reason why, as of late, I haven’t been exercising as diligently and eating as healthily. I have been using food as comfort, using my grief and emotional exhaustion as excuses.

“I deserve that extra slice of pie because of everything I’ve endured this year.”

“Who cares if I gorge on peanut butter? Nothing really matters anyway, not after all this.”

“I’m going to stuff my face just because it will temporarily soothe my sorrow.”

Yeah, these are prime examples of thoughts poisoning my mind and my sense of self. Of course, I am being gentle with myself all the same . . . I have been through a lot, much more than most 22-year-olds experience. So, I’m not really flagellating myself like a crazed monk for lack of self-discipline.

I’ve needed a break. I’ve needed to just let go and not. give. a. damn.

However, good health is still of top priority, and my recent habits, while certainly not that bad or anywhere remotely near SAD-ish, do not reflect WHO I want to be.

That’s why I’m beyond ready for 2011 to just be over already and for 2012 to offer the fresh start I really, really, really need. Of course, I know I can’t simply run away from my emotions—they will follow me, nipping at my heart like the shadow at my heels—nor can I just brush away my tears and feign happiness, because that isn’t healthy and will only complicate the healing process instead of contributing to it.

So, as a result, I’ve been rereading Kris Carr’s Crazy Sexy Diet, brushing up on some basics, facts that ground me like old friends. I’ve also been skimming Kathy Freston’s Quantum Wellness, which honestly crossed my path at the perfect time—there is an entire chapter about dealing with life crises, and I’ve found it exceedingly helpful in coping with my current circumstances.

As for my plans, well, tomorrow, I will wake up and begin anew. Sometimes, I wonder if I’m a chronic detox-er, but now, after watching first my father’s struggles with Type I diabetes and heart disease, and then my mother’s bout with metastatic breast cancer, I’ve “seen the light,” you can say, even more so than before—because honestly, a dietician once told me I eat healthier than anyone she’s ever met, including herself! But I, too, have certain vices that, nowadays, are bogging me down more than bringing me pleasure.

I’ve got to stop the vicious cycle. It’s preventing me from reaching my full potential, and we only live once, in this manifestation, so we must make the most of it! My parents, despite their premature deaths, lived incredibly eventful lives—I have so many hopes, dreams, and goals for my own life, too . . . beginning with discarding my negative baggage, forgiving, forgetting, relaxing my mind and floating downstream, as the Beatles would suggest.

In future, I resolve to approach obstacles with more grace, humility, and gentle strength, rather than with my all-or-nothing perfectionist rampage that never fails to hurt me more than help me.

I hope you, too, will tame your demons and discover Peace in the new year.

[Source]

Home Sweet Home!

AT LAST, I’M HOME!

And I couldn’t be happier. My spirit is refreshed and my inspiration renewed, and I am pumped for the remainder of summertime.

But first, a synopsis: yesterday was . . . stressful. Horribly so. I really find long-distance travel difficult, and this was an even more extenuating situation than usual—as in, I decided it would be better to sleep overnight in the airport in order to be 100% prepared for my early morning flight. The result: minimal, minimal sleep and subsequent exhaustion. Fortunately, I fueled my morning appetite properly—breakfast consisted of not 1, but 2 Larabars (Apple & Pecan pie—I am more of a pie than a cake girl after all), 2 apples, and some carrots with leftover zucchini-split pea pâté. I just couldn’t get enough fructose, it seems, which makes sense considering my lack of energy. My body was searching for a “quick fix”. Actually, my last couple of weeks in France saw a gradual increase in my usually low sugar intake . . . much more chocolate than usual, 3 desserts in Paris, and strong cravings for fruit, Larabars, and vegan chocolate chip cookies. Not that I’m anti-sugar, mind, (well, I am anti-refined sugar, I admit that outright), but starting on Monday night, my stomach was really starting to feel icky. I almost bought some yoghurt at Starbucks to soothe my gut with a cooling dose of probiotics, but my principles held firm and I accepted that I’d just have to wait until last night’s fabulous visit to Whole Foods to purchase some soy yoghurt.

A quick note: Paris’ Charles de Gaulle airport is not very vegan-friendly. You can find a few options in the convenience store, but don’t expect anything substantial, just snack foods.

In the meantime, I began chugging water—not desperately, but mindfully. I needed to cleanse my system, flush out any toxins, and essentially begin my “Back on Track after France” plan. Yeah, I frequented the bathroom more than is necessarily enjoyable, but it was rather amazing how quickly I began feeling better. My big breakfast packed with healthy, satiating fats, protein, and fiber kept me full for a whopping 10 hours, despite the distinct lack of complex carbs. What I really wanted from the get-go was a bowl of overnight oats, but sometimes, we must adapt to unusual circumstances such as travel. You can always resume your good habits (whether pertaining to eating, exercising, sleeping, etc.) once your journey is over, and little to no damage will have been done, I guarantee. But anyway, for me, 10 hours without eating is absolutely unheard of—and trust me, it wasn’t by choice, nor do I recommend it, especially if you’re running like a madwoman through customs . . . which was ultimately why I wasn’t able to grab lunch as planned. No falafel Panini for a sad Teniesha. Fortunately, all the anxiety suppressed my usual appetite, and I’d say there’s no question that I definitely succeeded in the intuitive eating department, something I’m quite proud of.

Secondly, Aer Lingus proved itself vegan-friendly, not just once, but three times. First, the snack was a packet of Worchestershire-flavoured crackers. Of course, I carefully checked the ingredients since Worchestershire sauce contains anchovies, but these were completed vegan—the packet even said so! They weren’t the healthiest crackers, but they didn’t contain anything horrible, i.e., anything I couldn’t pronounce. A little later, my requested vegan meal arrived, and while it was by no means gourmet, I was simply pleased to eat something after my 6:00 AM to 4:00 PM stint without any nourishment. I even snapped a quick photo before digging in (and I bet my fellow passengers thought I was an utter weirdo, haha. It’s just my job.)

The meal consisted of roasted vegetable pasta, a breadroll, a small salad, and fresh fruit. Nothing fabulous, of course, but what else can one expect unless they're flying First Class?

The last snack right before we landed in Chicago was a scone—and after yet again double-checking the ingredients in the one specially given to me, I confirmed that yes, indeed, it was vegan! I wasn’t really hungry (weirdly enough), but I ate it anyway because I knew I wouldn’t be eating dinner for at least another 5 hours (turned out to be closer to 7 hours). Granted, it wasn’t made from whole wheat flour. In fact, I was disappointed that none of carbohydrates were whole grains, but I was merely thankful to be fed yesterday; otherwise, I would have starved and suffered the wrath of what would have inevitably become an exceedingly HANGRY tummy (although I will say that Chicago is very vegan-friendly; I even saw bottles of coconut water for sale as I was walking to my gate). At least at Whole Foods I was able to feast the way I prefer, and the meal was both physically and spiritually uplifting! Unfortunately, I was so hungry that I totally forgot to take a photo of the salad beast I concocted. Whoops! Sorry!

Afterward, I delightedly stocked up on groceries, focusing especially on healing foods for today’s obligatory detox after all that Parisian dining and a day of copious stress and not the cleanest or most balanced eating, and then, I finally headed home. By the time I finally went to sleep, I’d been awake for more or less 30 hours straight. Nevertheless, I woke up wonderfully refreshed at 7:00 AM this morning and immediately went on a leisurely run, followed by a breakfast I’ve been dreaming of for three months:

Green smoothie--a whopping handful of spinach, banana, soymilk, and flaxseed. So. Amazingly. Delicious.

Farewell, France!

In the end, I decided to eat out one last time—to celebrate the conclusion of my journey in France as well as the 4^th of July (I must say, though, I’m a little sad not to be hosting a vegan barbeque today). Part of me really wanted to splurge on a meal at the Gentle Gourmet, a 100% vegan B&B, restaurant, and cooking school, but I just couldn’t justify the price ($58.00 per individual meal. YIKES!). Nevertheless, as I hope the last two entries have confirmed, Paris has a number of other vegan-friendly venues to explore. For lunch, I decided to visit Le Potager du Marais, especially after I saw that Angela had visited it before.

For my first course, I ordered a salad . . . and oh, was I disappointed! All I received was a plate of mixed greens. The picture in the menu included a variety of raw veggies with the romaine, so I felt cheated. But at least each table was equipped with gomashio and nutritional yeast for condiments.

My main course was the vegetable gratin topped with crushed hazelnuts and a drizzle of pesto, quinoa, and a small side salad. It was okay, but I felt the gratin could have been more flavourful. It's a great concept, though, so I intend on remaking it at home, with a few improvements.

Dessert was the orange-carrot flan with a drizzle of cherry sauce. Again, I was disappointed. I'd never had a flan before, so I thought it'd be a fun experience . . . but I think I should have ordered the chocolate crème instead.

My conclusion about Paris: eating out has mixed results. I generally found myself more disappointed than pleasantly surprised by my meals, and the prices were rarely worth it. I often even felt like I’m a more skillful chef than those employed by some of these restaurants, despite the fact that I only first started frequenting the kitchen less than 3 years ago. I am almost always impressed by the recipes I try at home, whereas I’ve only been impressed by a handful of restaurants in my couple of years as a self-proclaimed foodie.

So, for those of you who may someday find yourselves in Paris, here’s a quick, personal analysis (namely based on the quality/flavour of the food and the price) of the vegan-friendly restaurants I experienced:

The Loving Hut = totally, totally worth it, as in a MUST.

Les Saveurs Végét’Halles = worth it, though a couple of the sides were a bit bland.

Voy Alimento = totally worth it, even just for the sake of exoticism.

Pousse-Pousse = worth it, but just barely. It was very expensive, but the raw chocolate cake definitely impressed—would go again just for that dessert.

Krishna Bavan = very cheap and authentic, but veggies were severely lacking in my opinion.

Au Grain de Folie = not really worth it. I could have made everything at home, and the hummus was rather flavourless.

Oh! Bio = cheap, but boring. Not worth it.

Le Potager du Marais = quality food, but expensive and a bit lacking in flavour. I left severely disappointed. Considering the price, probably not worth it.

Anyway . . . today’s post is also the last in the What I Miss Monday series, and oh, do I miss SO many things—kale, kombucha, vegan pizza, braised daikon radishes, waffles, blueberries, black sesame seeds, lemon-poppyseed overnight oats, blueberries, sprouted-grain tortillas, miso soup, red delicious apples, green peas, tempeh, cornbread, and Bragg’s Liquid Aminos, to list just a few.

Above all, of course, I miss my HOME. But tomorrow that will all change. I fly out of Paris at 10:30 AM, arrive in Dublin within 30 minutes, depart from Ireland for an 8-hour transatlantic flight to Chicago, where I’ll arrive at 3:30 in the afternoon before boarding one last time around 5:00 for my final destination: Omaha. I will finally be finished with that horrendous journey at 6:45 PM (if, of course, there aren’t any delays. Let’s all cross our fingers!). I have already planned to go to Whole Foods afterward for dinner and groceries—I’ll probably start crying when I step through those doors and smell that wonderful, holistic, magical spices-and-soy-candles-and-Putomayo-music Whole Foods aroma.

Until then, though, I will need to fuel my body elsewhere, and as a vegan, I’ve had to conduct a little planning as to what I can eat and where. Tomorrow’s breakfast will be a no-brainer—an Apple Pie Larabar and an apple. Check.

Lunch required a little research. Of course, for my longhaul flight on Aer Lingus, I also had the option of requesting a vegan meal, which I did, and it’ll be interesting to see what I receive. For one, in my experience, airplane food is never that great, vegan or otherwise. Secondly, airlines are notorious for not fully comprehending exactly what “vegan” means. And thirdly, even if the meal is totally free of animal products to begin with, the food’s quality will probably be questionable—think overcooked veggies, soggy white rice, a partially squished refined-white-flour-and-fiberless roll. You get the picture. So, I’m planning on purchasing an easy lunch-to-go in Dublin. Is Dublin International Airplort veg-friendly? Yes, indeed, according to this fabulous blog. I’m already planning on seeking out a falafel Panini at Starbucks. Because, as has been established, falafel rocks my world. If the onboard meal doesn’t meet my standards, I’ll at least have a back-up plan; if it appears edible, then I can save my sandwich for later, either for another meal or for snacking.

I also brought along some other easy snacks, namely nuts & dried fruit, carrots, and a second apple. This traveling-back-in-time thing will be an interesting test where intuitive eating is concerned—I’ll probably end up eating 4 main meals tomorrow, but that more or less makes sense since I’ll also be adding an extra 7 hours to my day. Plus, I’ll need SUPER nutrition and nourishment to combat any potential jetlag, though I’m hoping my excitement, anxiety, and adrenaline will surge just enough to avoid exhaustion (or at least, the feeling of exhaustion) whilst making my way from country to country, from continent to continent, from one side of the airport to another. It’ll be a horrendously looooooong and boring day, undoubtedly.

But I am MORE than ready to return home, ready to relax for the remainder of summer, ready to get back into the kitchen for some serious culinary experimentation!

Paris, Days 3 & 4

I am certainly eating well in Paris, and the variety is fun–but to be honest, I’m ready to return to my kitchen and cook for myself. Eating out quickly loses that certain “special” factor. It’s no longer a treat when it becomes habit. Nevertheless, I’m here with more foodie adventures to share.

Yesterday's lunch was at a vegan/raw cafe called Pousse-Pousse. I was really excited for some raw options.

I splurged and ordered my first ever wheatgrass shot! I did taste like I was drinking grass, but it rocked all the same.

Some raw flaxseed crackers were served with the meal.

Sadly, the main courses of the day were raw, but I chose a cashew-roasted red pepper couscous timbale accompanied by hummus, vegan coleslaw, and a big fresh salad with sprouts.

And dessert--raw chocolate cake with toasted buckwheat crunchies and a smear of grapefruit glaze there on the plate. It was so rich and dense and wonderful . . . I savoured every bite!

I went to a 100% vegetarian Indian restaurant called Krishna Bavan for dinner. They were very accommodating when I explained I don't eat dairy and so replaced the traditional yoghurt in the chana masala with coconut milk--it was SO creamy!

Whole wheat chapati to accompany the chana masala.

Today's lunch was at a vegetarian restaurant called Au Grain de Folie, a cute little Hippie haven that first opened in 1981.

The lunch platter included grated carrot and white & purple cabbage with a lemon-miso dressing and sesame seeds, a roasted vegetable tart, brown rice with onions, French lentils, and a slice of bread with hummus and an olive. Simple, yet satisfying.

Finally, for dinner, I went to a 100% organic and very vegan-friendly cafe called Oh! Bio, where I ordered an Indian quinoa patty with a fresh salad and steamed green beans. Nothing special, and I was so sad because all the vegan green tea cupcakes were already sold out. Fail.

So, tomorrow’s my last day in Paris, and I’m not sure whether or not I’m going to eat out anymore. I might just buy enough veggies for the day for easy salads–I have bread and a lentil-zucchini dip already. We’ll see what happens . . . I’m just kind of burnt out on restaurants.

Paris, Days 1 & 2

When planning my Paris itinerary, of course I sought out vegan restaurants to try. I eat breakfast (peanut butter, banana, and alfalfa sprout sandwiches = WIN!) at the apartment in which I’m lodging, and while I debated buying salad supplies for dinner since I have a mini-fridge, in the end I decided to splurge on eating out for both lunch and dinner while I’m here. Why shouldn’t I? I’m in Paris, France. I’m not buying cheesy souvenirs or haute couture or touring the city on double-decker buses; I’d much rather spend a few extra Euros here and there on some delicious world-class cuisine.

For Thursday night's dinner, I went to the famous Loving Hut restaurant, and it was as fabulous as people claim!

Choosing a main course was HARD! I debated ordering vegan quiche, crepes, or pizza, but in the end, I chose the Vietnamese noodle bowl with vermicelli rice noodes, cucumber, grated carrots, cabbage, crushed peanuts, and delicious marinated seitan, all of which was bathed in the sauce pictured there. The meal also came with two eggrolls, which I took with me and ended up eating for breakfast the next day, hahaha. Everything was DELICIOUS!

Of course, I knew I'd order cheesecake (with raspberry coulis) for dessert, and OMG, it was amazing, as I mentioned in my previous post. Absolutely luscious to the last bite.

Yesterday's lunch was at the nearly 100% vegan restaurant Les Saveurs Végét’Halles.

For the first course, I ordered beet gazpacho--a fabulous twist on a traditional classic.

For my main course, I ordered mushroom-seitan cutlets with a blackberry-ginger sauce, accompanied by split pea casserole, farro pilaf, and a fresh salad. Delicious and SO filling!

For dessert, all I really wanted was some fresh fruit, so that's what I had: watermelon, pineapple, apple, kiwi, one little strawberry (shame), mango, and a fresh fig, my first ever! And of course, presentation here was key--so pretty!

Dinner was at another 100% vegan restaurant called Voy Alimento, whose specialty is South American superfoods.

I had a small dinner because I wasn't very hungry, but it was INCREDIBLE! I didn't know exactly what everything was since the ingredients were rather exotic. Clockwise from top: sesame seed salad with veggie goodies and herbs of some sort; dried fruit of sorts with caramelized scallions; beet, cantaloupe, and mint leaf salad; an amazing purée of cashews, acai powder, and tamari; radish and potato salad; quinoa; and in the middle, half of a sweet potato blini and half of a purple potato blini. Wow, wow, wow! My inner foodie REJOICED!

Be back tomorrow with days 3 and 4!

Food & Friendship in France

Yesterday was my last full day in Pau. I wasn’t sad by any means, and I’m not going to miss it there in the slightest. I will, however, miss the few wonderful people I’ve met, especially my Finnish friends, who were kind enough to let me spend my final night at their apartment and share both a delicious lunch and dinner! For lunch, we enjoyed an arugula, cucumber, and tomato salad with homemade pesto for dressing (brilliant idea, by the by!), zucchini-lentil curry, and brown rice. And then, for dinner . . . FALAFEL! Best. Food. Ever. Just sayin’.

At its most basic level, food is nourishment, but truly, it nourishes more than just our bodies—it can also nourish our souls and fuel our friendships. Eating together, breaking bread together, is a way of sharing human experience. We may not all like the same music or support the same political party, but we ALL eat, we ALL enjoy a special meal now and then.

Some people assume that being vegan makes it difficult to share meals with others, and they’re right—if your friends insist on frequenting burger joints and steakhouses. True friends will support your plant-based diet and will strive to cook food or seek restaurants that you, too, can enjoy alongside even the most meat-loving omnivores. You may also discover your friends becoming more and more interested in vegetarianism or veganism themselves, or at least ordering veg-friendly dishes when you eat out, and you can congratulate yourself for inspiring these little steps toward positive change.

I'm a huge fan of both "Alice in Wonderland" and Arthur Rackham, as well as tea parties, which, in my opinion, are prime opportunities to nourish body and soul. Plus, I assuming a lot of the animals in Wonderland were vegan?

[Source]

Speaking of change, while here in France, of course I learned a lot about culture, which included food and dining.

What France Taught Me about Food

1)    I will never again take certain foods or my well-equipped kitchen for granted.

This is pretty self-explanatory. Upon first arriving in Pau, it took me a WEEK to find non-hydrogenated peanut butter (though even the icky, hydrogenated brands were not readily available in the average supermarket), and I never did find any kale or blueberries. Furthermore, who knew a girl could miss her oven? Or her waffle iron? And I will seriously kiss my food processor when we are reunited.

2)    Veganism is slowly, but surely spreading worldwide, and though it’s not always convenient, the pros definitely outweigh the cons.

I actually didn’t officially become vegan until I’d already arrived in France. I’d stopped eating eggs and cheese in March, but come April, I expected to rely on cheese again in order to survive French restaurants. Some people would call it crazy to switch to veganism whilst living in France, but after two nasty bouts of lactose intolerance symptoms, I decided it just wasn’t worth it. And lo and behold, as my blog has (hopefully) revealed, it WASN’T really hard! Just goes to show how far the movement has progressed . . . and will continue to improve with time and increased awareness.

3)    I like bread, but whole grains are the Universe’s gift to humankind.

I really enjoy the occasional sandwich (especially tempeh reubens!), but bread (whole grain, of course) just doesn’t seem to stick to my ribs as well as brown rice does, for example. This doesn’t mean I’m going to avoid bread—it’s just works better as a snack, I think, especially when accompanied by mashed avocado. Heavenly.

4)    When I don’t eat enough fruit, I overdo it on dark chocolate.

Not that dark chocolate is unhealthy by any means (on the contrary!), but because organic fruit in France is a) quite expensive, and b) pretty poor quality, I often only consumed 1.5 servings a day, and most of that was dried fruit, not fresh. Sadly, I haven’t had the opportunity to enjoy the summertime berry season yet, but that’ll all change next Wednesday, when I’ll be able to indulge in strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries to my heart’s content—at least 3 servings per day. In turn, I suspect my sugar cravings will be much more easily diminished . . . which leads me to my third point . . .

5)    I have a more of a sweet tooth than I previously wanted to admit, but I’m human, I’m a foodie, and I do enjoy desserts upon occasion.

I’m truly a savoury girl when it comes to flavours, and my baking skills are virtually nonexistent (something I plan on remedying ASAP), but before, when I suffered from disordered eating patterns, I avoided sweet treats like the plague and pretty successfully convinced myself that I didn’t like baked goods. BIG. LIE. While I will usually choose cornbread over cookies every once in a while I genuinely WANT to eat that vegan cupcake or indulge in a bowl of coconut milk ice cream—and there’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. It’s not going to transform me into a sugar-sucking beast. Besides, compared to the French, my sweet tooth is tame.

6)    My digestive system simply cannot handle late dinners.

One frustrating thing about the French is how late they eat dinner—usually between 8-9:00 (though that’s early compared to the Spanish, who dine close to 10:00). All my life, I’ve tended to eat dinner between 5:30-7:00, and after long days of class here, I would usually arrive home around 6:30 quite famished and ready to feast. A couple situations required me to wait until later, though, sometimes until 9:30, and not only would I get HANGRY, but I generally found it difficult to sleep peacefully with a full and churning stomach and I’d also wake up with indigestion. Yuck.

7)    Snacking is good, but square meals are better. Maybe.

Before coming to France, I was a HUGE snacker. I usually ate 6 small meals a day or 3 moderate meals with 3 small snacks in between, and in hindsight, I now realize this pattern was sometimes more habit than intuition. Here, though, class scheduling often prevented me from snacking, so I had to increase my meals in order to avoid annoying afternoon tummy growls. To my surprise, I found, in many cases, I preferred feeling full longer rather than getting hungry every 3-4 hours and interrupting whatever I was doing to snack. It was somewhat . . . liberating. It’ll be interesting to see what happens when I’m home again—will I resume my old “schedule,” or will I start eating 3 square meals with perhaps 1 snack if I need it? Though, honestly, it all boils down to intuitive eating. Some days, I’m hungrier than others or I exercise more intensely, and in order to nourish myself properly, I NEED those extra snacks to feel my best, which is most important of all . . .

8)    Finally, proper nourishment really does equal happiness.

Though I haven’t gone into detail concerning my past relationship with food (and perhaps I will someday), I’ve briefly mentioned upon a couple occasions that I’ve struggled with disordered eating. It wasn’t full-blown anorexia . . . but it was pretty close. I’m not ashamed to admit it; what I am often ashamed of is how the psychological residue still gnaws at me and how, in turn, little signs of relapse pop up every once in a while. Before leaving home, I considered myself more or less fully “recovered,” but France proved otherwise. Due to copious stress, homesickness, and seemingly constant difficulties, I suddenly found myself seeking to control something—and that something was, of course, food. I felt it was okay since the only exercise I did was yoga and walking to and from campus and around the city; I somehow convinced myself I WAS eating enough despite the headaches and grouchiness, despite the fact I’d wake up wayyyyyyy too early STARVING, despite the fact I could feel the weight dropping off and could see how loose my jeans were becoming. It was a masochistic sort of coping mechanism, and my common sense was severely clouded. I finally hit the wall yesterday when I awoke at 4:00 with a terrible gnawing, desperate hunger; but not only was I ravenous, I was absolutely furious at myself because I finally recognized the truth, and thanks to Amanda and Nicky (whose posts were impeccably timed), I was able to muster my strength and turn things around. Hunger hurts, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Here I was, discussing how I don’t want to harm animals and the environment, yet I was simultaneously harming myself. Compassion starts with you—if you can’t be compassionate toward yourself, how can you truly extend compassion to others?

[Source]

So, that’s my longwinded post for today, and for the month (I just glanced at my calendar). I arrived in Paris I’ll be back tomorrow with some serious food porn. Tonight, I visited a very famous vegan restaurant chain for my first meal in Paris. Can you guess which one? Just a head’s up: the cheesecake was TO DIE FOR! And yes, I ate an entire slice all by myself, no guilt included.

What I Miss Monday 7

I couldn’t decide on just one food today, namely because I’ve been craving them all together rather than separately.

Mushrooms + Nutritional Yeast + Risotto

[Source: VeggieNumNum, which is a fabulous blog!]

I’ve been eating a lot of rice as of late because I’ve embarked on Operation Clean Out the Cupboards—as in, I’ve only 3 more days in Pau, and I need to eat up the remainder of shelf-stable foods I purchased. This is why I haven’t posted any recipes as of late; there’s no reason now to buy certain, more specialized ingredients, so I’m relying on salads at the moment. I travel to Paris on Thursday, though, so expect at least 3 posts detailing my foodie adventures there (I’ve already planned my culinary itinerary, and while I won’t spill the beans about my restaurant choices beforehand, let’s just say that I’m as excited to eat out as I am to luxuriate in the Louvre for a day!). More recipes will follow as soon as I’m home again next week (YAY!), I promise.

Anyway, back to the rice—I’d noticed several bloggers I follow posting risotto recipes, and oh, the photos looked so creamy and delicious that, naturally, I started wishing I had some nutritional yeast on hand. A lot of these said recipes also included mushrooms, something I haven’t enjoyed now for three months, and a mushroom-less Teniesha is a sad Teniesha. Mushrooms are ghastly expensive in France, and not just the celebrated truffles and cèpes either, but all varieties.

Oh, well, only a week to go now.

In the meantime, I’ll share some photos of today’s lunch. A friend treated me to a delicious, wholesome meal at Asphodèle, which I’d visited once before. We’d considered Indian or North African cuisine, but today, it’s pushing 100 degrees! Curries and tagines would have been much, much too hot!

For my first course, I had gazpacho with tomato, basil, and a hint of ginger. Perfectly chilled for a hot, hot day, and yes, those little specks of colour are tiny flowers. <3

The main course was . . . a salad beast! Romaine, purple cabbage, grated carrots & beets, summer squash, mushrooms (YAY!), tomato, olives, pineapple, pumpkin and sunflower seeds, and hazelnuts. There was also some wonderful hummus, which I spread on the bread that accompanied the entire meal, and then, there were some cucumbers in a yoghurt sauce, which I ate despite the yoghurt. There was a glob of soft cheese, which I didn't eat at all, but of course, I enjoyed that slice of wonderfully juicy cantalope.

A nice little dessert to finish the meal--light strawberry tofu mousse.

Celebration!

Yesterday, I finished my French classes for the trimester and for the summer, and a celebration was a must. So, today, a couple friends and I returned to Pau’s 100% vegetarian and organic restaurant, Les Amants du Marché, for lunch—and naturally, I snapped photos of my delicious eats!

My first course was quinoa tabbouleh, accompanied by a pita bread wedge and pink (!) hummus, which I believe was slightly sweetened by rosewater. So delicious, and how adorable is the jar in which they served the tabbouleh?!

I'm not exactly sure what my main course was, but it was tasty either way. From what I could discern, it was a stack of spicy mixed veggies and soy crumbles topped with pureed potatoes and mushroom gravy. It was accompanied by a lovely fresh salad and poppyseed basmati rice. I also ate half a piece of sourdough bread--perfectly crispy crust, perfectly moist interior. Heaven. <3

Odd Vegan Out

Being vegan isn’t always easy. Eating out often requires researching restaurants beforehand; baked goods at birthday parties are usually off-limits; and when friends order pizza for dinner, you may or may not be able to enjoy a slice. This is one main argument against veganism—in short, it can be inconvenient, and some people may even feel excluded as a result.

I’ll admit it—veganism can, indeed, be difficult. One tends to more frequently encounter awkward situations where, suddenly, his or her personal dietary preferences are in the spotlight, and not necessarily in a positive way.

“What’s a vegan?”

“But humans are designed to eat meat.”

“Where do you get your protein?”

“You’re missing out on so many of life’s pleasures, though!”

“So, what can you eat, then?”

To make matters worse, one may even find themselves at a meal where all they can eat or order is a boring old salad—if anything at all! And then, while everyone else laughing and enjoying their food, you’re embarrassed, self-conscious of that excuse for a salad or that grumbling tummy, and sort of disputing whether or not veganism is really worth the struggles.

Trust me, I’ve been there, and it’s not fun, I know.

Sometimes, conventional restaurants will try to accommodate. Once, my family and I went to Olive Garden (definitely not my first choice, but I was the minority, sadly), and I simply asked for a bowl of whole wheat pasta with steamed mixed veggies. What inevitably arrived was about 3-4 SERVINGS of linguine drenched in tomato sauce with a few pieces of broccoli scattered about, and the dish wasn’t even warm. I ate the broccoli and a few bites of noodles before deciding that it just wasn’t worth it.

Upon an even worse occasion, my father wanted to take my mum and me out to the local Chinese (read: severely Americanized Chinese) restaurant, where there is literally nothing on the menu I can eat. My solution? Take a Tupperware container with some plain tofu and leftover brown rice and order a heaping plate of steamed veggies. Man, did that garner more than a fair share of stares!

Fortunately, for me, these situations are relatively uncommon. While my hometown has absolutely no vegan-friendly restaurants, larger, neighboring cities do have options here and there. For example, I’m only an hour drive away from Omaha, Nebraska, where Isa Chandra Moskowitz now lives of all places!

However, at the moment, I’m in France, and vegan awareness hasn’t spread nearly as successfully here as it has in the States. When I say explain “Je suis végétalienne,” (translation: I’m vegan), some people understand, others occasionally reply, “Do you eat fish?” Some are intrigued by my lifestyle; others are shocked that I can survive at all; but all in all, thanks to a little planning and politesse, politeness, on my part, I’ve been able to avoid those aforementioned awkward situations.

For the most part.

This is my last week of classes here at the University of Pau, and on Tuesday, my classmates, my teachers, and me gathered for a collective luncheon. In order to explore our nationalities’ diversity, everyone was asked to contribute a dish characteristic of their country.

Let’s just say I was more than reticent to attend. In fact, I was almost . . . scared. I could envision a table laden with dishes I wouldn’t be able to eat. I seriously considered skipping class that day, but I didn’t want to be a downer either. I wanted to prove to myself and to others that, even as a vegan, I could enjoy this event.

Unfortunately, thanks to limited kitchen facilities at my residence, I couldn’t contribute a dish (which would have been an excellent opportunity to confirm how delicious vegan fare can be, but then again, my fellow students didn’t really eat any veggies anyway, so they probably would have steered clear of my contribution anyway). However, I did buy some organic, fair-trade chocolate from Alter Eco to share. For myself, I packed a serving of chickpeas and some wholegrain bread just in case, assuming someone would maybe, just maybe, bring a salad. At least I knew I wouldn’t starve.

And thankfully, I didn’t!

Two wonderful friends of mine remembered me in particular—one girl, indeed, brought a fresh salad, another brought roasted veggies. I was so touched. I piled my plate with substantial helpings of both and topped it all with my chickpeas. Another classmate brought olives from Spain—voilà! My healthy fat.

And then . . . then, there was the big no-no of my day.

A classmate from Chile, whose younger brothers are both vegetarian, brought empanadas, which are usually stuffed with meat, but he had made a vegetarian version, he emphasized, so I could enjoy them, too.

“But there’s cheese in them,” he said.

“They contain cheese?” I double-checked. He nodded.

My conscience debated with itself for several seconds . . . and then, I reached for an empanada.

But wait! Vegans don’t eat cheese!

You’re absolutely right. But I had my reasons, good reasons, in my opinion, and I don’t really regret my choice.

Firstly, this classmate had especially considered me whilst making the empanadas. He could have filled them with ground beef, for example, but he didn’t, opting instead to use spinach, corn, and, yes, some mozzarella so everyone could enjoy them. In turn, I felt rather obligated to demonstrate my gratitude, and to do so meant to eat one.

Secondly, I honestly really wanted to try one. I’d never had an empanada before, and I wanted the experience. It didn’t help that they smelled delicious, and indeed, they were fabulous!

Yes, I felt a little guilty. I felt I had let myself down somehow, abandoned a principle in which I believe so strongly. My body also experienced some side effects—cramps, gas, clamminess, a racing heartbeat, a little rash on my right cheek and wrist, and, most prevalent of all, yesterday morning I woke up with a very nasty case of indigestion, which I used to experience from time to time when I still ate cheese as a ovo-lacto-vegetarian. So, physically, I learned my lesson.

As for my principles, there were other meatless dishes that contained dairy and eggs, and I avoided those—traditional Spanish tortillas, apple pie, dessert crêpes, and an almond tart that looked delicious, but contained eggs, heavy whipping cream, and copious amounts of butter. I had no desire to try any of those offerings, just the empanadas, and I’m glad I did eat one, because now, I’m more or less obligated to make a vegan version upon returning home!

All in all, the luncheon was successful. Only one classmate made snarky comments when I asked if something had eggs in it.

“No, but it has baked baby chickens in it,” he replied.

This kid is only 19 and still very immature, but his words stung nonetheless. I was appalled, as were a couple of other girls sitting next to me, but I didn’t respond. Honestly, I didn’t know how to reply; I just stared at him for several seconds as he laughed at his joke and then lowered my eyes toward my plate. I wanted to cry. I wanted to get up and walk out on everyone then and there. I felt so alone.

But then, I reminded myself that I’m not alone. Far from it. More and more people all around the world are embracing plant-based diets everyday, and together, united, we are spreading awareness in order to fight ignorance, whether it stems from defensiveness or just plain lack of knowledge.

The key is not letting this ignorance gnaw at us. We must remain strong in our beliefs and positive in our behaviour. On a past episode of Vegan Radio, I remember hearing that while extremism won’t win many (if any) followers, “happy veganism is contagious.”

So, this week’s lesson wasn’t really about “cheating” and consuming cheese—it was a reminder that, sometimes, being different isn’t always easy, but in many cases, including dietary preferences, it’s worth it. The benefits of veganism are indisputable, and personally, I feel my best, physically and mentally, when I eschew all animal products from my diet. I shouldn’t have to justify that to anyone.

I stand proud in my choice, and I hope you will, too.

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What I Miss Monday 6

Today’s post was originally supposed to feature coconut, but as I revealed yesterday, I recently bought some flaked coconut, much to my delight. One thing I’ve wanted for a number of recipes, but haven’t been able to find, is . . .

Cilantro

[Source]

A staple of Indian and Southwestern cuisine, cilantro is one of my most used herbs at home, alongside parsley and basil. When I made curried veggies this weekend, I could tell something was missing—and that something was cilantro. Then, for tonight’s dinner, I made the following recipe I dreamed up last week, which was delicious, but would have been admittedly better with some fresh cilantro.

Caribbean Coconut Beans & Rice

Serves 4

Ingredients

1 cup long-grain brown rice, soaked overnight and cooked

1 cup black, kidney, or pinto beans, soaked overnight and cooked

1 large sweet potato

1 cup sweet corn kernels

2 large tomatoes, diced

1 large green bellpepper, diced

4 scallions, chopped

1 orange, segmented and chopped

½ cup fresh cilantro, finely chopped

1 large banana, sliced

Toasted flaked coconut

For the dressing

¼ cup orange juice

1 Tbs. safflower oil or other neutral oil

1 Tbs. lime juice

1 Tbs. minced garlic

2 tsp. cumin

¼ tsp. cinnamon

1/8 tsp. allspice

Salt & pepper to taste

Directions

1. Microwave or roast the sweet potato until tender, but not too soft. Chop into ½-inch pieces.
2. To make the dressing, whisk together all ingredients, and set aside.
3. In a large bowl, combine all the rice, beans, sweet potato, sweet corn, tomatoes, bellpepper, scallions, orange, and cilantro. Mix together well, and add dressing, drizzling it on evenly and stirring everything a second time.
4. To serve, divide mixture amongst four plates, topping with banana slices and toasted coconut as desired.

Instead of orange and banana, try adding mango, pineapple, or other tropical fruits of your choice!

Cilantro